love is in the air : valentine diys + a love story

early in our relationship, john and i agreed not to do gifts anymore. the superficial stuff just started to feel silly and we're not ones for going through the motions. i also said no more flowers please (unless they're potted) because i feel bad throwing cut flowers away (well we compost them, but still) and now kati tries to eat them which isn't good since some plants can be toxic to animals.

so our valentine's days are low-key and stress-free, just the way we like 'em. it comes and goes like any other day around here and though you may think that's boring, it's actually really nice! of course we're extra sweet to each other and i may even make or buy chocolates. and john will be extra patient with my questions and may even offer to take me somewhere he dreads going like to the thrift store or food shopping. (yes, we really know how to do romance over here!)

valentine's day is a special date for us, actually, because that was the day we had our first unofficial date in 2007. we were just old friends from high school when john myspaced me on my bday (feb 11th) and then again on vday, and said let's go out and represent the sexy singles.=) (aww, remember myspace?) it was snowy so john came and picked me up, and i wore black in protest of the stupid lover's holiday (because that's how i was feeling that year, though i did wear a red tank top peaking from underneath my sweater.=) from that day on we were inseparable.


my mom knew something was up, but since i dated john's close friend in high school, i thought anything more than friends was out of the question. i told her i just wanted him to be my best friend. people would say a guy who wants to see you every day doesn't just want to be friends! but that's what we were - best friends from the start. in less than two weeks a romantic relationship developed, and here we are now, love twins for life.=)

what i was getting at is though it's a special date for us that holds some very sweet memories, we don't do gifts, but if we did, i think i would have to insist that it be something from the heart, preferably hand-made or hand-written. or maybe even a nice surprise like straightening up the basement (ahem, john if you're reading). so throughout this long-winded post are photos that link to some beautiful diys i'd love to receive or make for myself any time of year really. how about you?

edit: just saw lesley jean's love: lotion bars and had to add them.

happy monday!

xoxoxo

winter fun: a tale of two feet

ok, i'm not sure where to start this post so i'll just go ahead and tell you that i have big feet. and the left one is bigger than the right. and if i'm not going crazy, i think they're still growing. i know, very weird. so now a bigger size usually fits the bigger foot in length, but they are way too wide. my feet are swimming.

i'm long and narrow. negative curves so there's just no balance. when i walk into a room, i really walk into a room. shoes a clunking. big ol' shoes. no matter how cute a shoe is, it is just not cute anymore in a large size. see for yourself. it's just so sad. why didn't my mother bind my feet?! (totally kidding. i read what that was like. not even funny kelli.)

in high school i just had to wear this outift that i thought made me look oh so fashionable and sophisticated. problem was, i didn't have the right shoes. my friend up the street did, but she was barely 5 foot and could still wear a kid's shoe. so what did i do? suffered eight hours of torture in her tiny heeled boots, carrying around a big ol' bag of heavy textbooks better yet. i'm surprised i didn't tip over. would i do it again? you bet your ass i would. that outfit was classy!=)

ha, no really, i wish i didn't treat my feet that way. i wish i could say that was the only time i did that. but i always wore shoes a little snug. the smaller the cuter. it was normal for my feet to feel pinched and sore at the end of the day. very sad, i know. what was that saying...pain is beauty...?

but, ladies and gentleman, nation, i am here to say here and now, on and for the record, on this cold and snowy 25th day of january, that i am hereby and henceforth...setting my footsies free!

and that is why you may see me around town wearing a big ol' pair of totes boots with a tag on the tongue that reads: winter fun. yes, my boots have a message for you.

don't think i don't know how silly they are. john actually picked them out for me because he was tired of me complaining that i just wanted a good comfy boot!

"here, try these on."

"they're totes. don't they make umbrellas?"

"just try them on. they're a good solid shoe."

"ohhh, these feel niceee. but they say winter fun!"

"who cares. no one'll see that."

yeah, no one will notice my big ginormous boots with the snowflake on the tongue. and words. on my boot tongue.

but i love them. they're soft. they keep my feet warm. and they keep me from breaking my neck. 

and after he watched me trekking in the snowy icy parking lot to return my overdue library books, he said to me, now aren't you glad you bought those boots? why yes, john, actually i am. but i still wish they didn't say winter fun.

what do you mean? john said with a chuckle. those boots are you! that's like the title of one of your blog posts! (no john, actually that one was called snow fun. like so fun. or no fun. get it?)

and then it hit me like a snowball right in the face.

i am someone who would wear the words winter fun on my boots.

and i would call a post winter fun.

and there you have it.

snow what?=)

happy saturday

hello friends! today i got new jeans in the mail and as you can see, i'm excited! it had been years since i bought myself a decent pair of pants. these are joe jeans that go for around $150 in stores and guess what...i got them for $15 on ebay, with free shipping! that's like a 90% discount!

in the garden, we've still got sunflowers and a few watermelons growing. i was late planting the melons. i'm late with my fall crops too, though the peas i planted last month are looking good.

i finally got around to making my peach pepper jam. this morning i tried it on a sesame bagel with cream cheese. i was afraid my jam was going to be too spicy, but it actually has hardly any heat at all. weird because when i did a taste test it was way too hot. hmph.

john made us dinner the other night and it was delicious! sauteed portabellos and bell pepper with a side of guacamole and vegetarian baked beans. i have been a lazy jane in the kitchen around dinner time. i'd much rather come home and lounge around with a book.

yesterday i started to read hiroshima by john hersey and i feel compelled to say a little something about war. first, at its core, war is against all that we are at our core. the suffering created by bombs and attacks is unbelievably cruel and inhumane. i actually had to stop reading the book because i was too upset. i am praying very hard for peace in the middle east, because it's all i know to do about it at this point. i know many others are too, and that leaves me feeling hopeful.

a war can not be fought if we all refuse to fight. it's all a choice. love or fear, we choose.



sending lots of love to you and yours. xoxoxo

weekend snippets

this was one of those weekends that go nice and slow. no appointments or places to be...some housework to tend to, but more play and relaxation...and even a little pampering.=)

1 // a mix of fenugreek and alfalfa sprouts - brought these with me to chipotle grill and put them in my vegetable burrito with a little bit of lemon. mmm! 2 // was pleasantly surprised to notice how much my aloe plant has grown. 3 // made a sweet banana/spirulina/cucumber/chia seed/lemon smoothie and found some daisies out back to pose with it.=) 4 // played with kati and her feather toy in the squares. she loves diving under the rows of squares that still need to be joined. how could i join them now? 5 // gave myself a much-needed facial with... 6 // ...raw apple cider vinegar and indian healing clay 7 // made some deodorant with coconut oil, lavender oil, and just a little bit of arrowroot and baking soda. 8 // discovered my old embroidered hearts look really cute with the vintage cream cardigan i found this week at frugal thrift shop. (someone's already thinking about vday craftsss.=) 9 // sat out in the sun with kati, but only a minute because it was too cold!

what made you happy this weekend?

handmade journals and 2013 goals

with various sorts of paper and string, i've been crafting myself little journal planners.

inspired by the blogosphere, i've written a list of goals for myself at the start of winter journal 2013. here it goes:

year-round gardening :: indoor seed-starting and a hoophouse to grow greens next winter
more preserving :: especially bell pepper and eggplant
keep flower-pressing :: and come up with a better system to share
better blogging :: name change and new design - in utero
prettier pictures :: put a little more effort into it
make more cards/send more snail mail
daily stretching/meditation :: the first always seems to lead to the next. keep doing it.
raw fruits and vegetables at every meal
daily walks
crochet class :: find someone to help me decipher the 1970's cover-up pattern (es muy dificil)
trust in love/the divine/the source/the creator/the supreme soul/god/the universe/allah or whatever you like to call the mysterious energy behind all that is to keep us in its light.

there are also smaller goals written this week :: jan 1 - jan 6 garden plan/make sprouted grain bread/learn sunburst granny square. did i accomplish any? nope, but there's still tomorrow!=)

what are you working on, in the new year and beyond?

my dream wedding

the idea of planning a wedding horrifies me. i've co-hosted three parties and that was enough stress for one lifetime thankyou.

truth be told, john and i live on a very modest budget. we don't give in to societal pressures and with what we understand about the marriage license, we'd never allow one in our relationship. 

but last night in my dreams, we were united in a beautiful ceremony by the lake. everyone i knew was there, even the boys from the bus stop. celine dion was there too, singing the bridal chorus! ha, who knew i was such a fan!



it wasn't the details that made it my dream wedding - it was the way i felt. there was so much love. everyone was dancing and laughing. i don't remember my dress or my hair, but i do remember an immense feeling of joy. i remember picking flowers for the bouquets and delighting in a coral-blue sunset. it felt like heaven.

so if john and i never have a real ceremony, know that you were at my dream wedding. you danced the night away, you looked great, and we thank you for being there.=)

photo source

some thoughts...

this week was trying. i babysat. it was rainy, humid and gloomy (with spurts of sun). we lounged around and the kids wanted to watch a horrible little show called fairly oddparents repeatedly. (though i had to laugh when jay leno's superhero character said, "i put the man in mandible!"=).

at least this week the ruby gloom theme song didn't torture my brain.

i'd rather they not watch tv at all so we craft, paint, and play games, but with 1-6 year olds, that doesn't last more than 20 minutes. (yes, the one-year old paints. beautifully.) so what do you do with the other 500 minutes? lots and lots of thumb wrestling, tickle tirades and staring contests.=)

i had to practically carry them outdoors to play in the sprinkler (mrs. wiggles), where we stumbled upon another animal their cat oscar got a hold of.=( i kind of feel responsible because oscar started getting out on my watch. but what do you do when an animal is begging to be let outside?

we're dealing with it with kati. we let her out once to see if she'd stay with us, but she strayed. we've tried a harness from a local pet store and it fit terribly. she did ok with it and even walked with me around the block the first time it was on, but you could tell she felt uncomfortable.

so now we're waiting for a jacket type of harness to arrive in the mail. we think she'll do better with that, and we're hoping if we walk her and play with her enough, the urge to go outside and kill animals won't be so strong.

this week was supposed to be the week i eat healthier. yeah right. though i did sprout some alfalfa and make raw nut tuna and nori snacks. gotta focus on the positive.=)

so i think i'm starting to feel a smidge of how stay-at-home mom's feel. i can't explain it, but it's just a draining feeling. children, though adorable, sweet bundles of joy, can really suck the life out of you! they can't help it, but sometimes it's just too much for one adult to handle all day alone. especially when you're watching five at a time.

i think villages where mothers all sit around and breast-feed and help out with each other's chidren really have the right idea. those children may not have nice sneakers and nintendo games, but i bet they feel rich with love from their mommies.

what the heck are we rushing for in our society anyway? the finish line? which is what - retirement? death? i do not do well on a go-go-go schedule. i need time to breathe it all in. i'm not talking holidays or vacations. i just want regular days at home where i do laundry, play in the garden, and contemplate the meaning of it all. is that too much to ask?=)

for those who say "you have to work", oh, know that i sure do work. i despise cleaning, so that's hard work, and gardening is no joke. i work on my health, my relationships, and keeping my cat happy and healthy, and most tryingly, i work on my bitchy miserable self (the side of kelli i try my best to shelter you from, poor john knows her best these days) and that takes more energy than anything! whose to say paid work is more important? how did we ever fall victim to that mentality?

this weekend i will rest. and clean. and play with kati. sunday is the american vegan society's garden party. i'll be volunteering in the bookroom. come and visit if you're in the area!

i want to sincerely thank you for reading my ramblings. it's nice to connect with people from all over the globe. makes my world feel sweet and cozy.=)

have a wonderful weekend! the sun's starting to come out. i hope it shines on you as well!=)

reflecting on my saturn return

most of us have heard of a mid-life crisis, but how many know of the age-thirty transition?

the age-thirty transition corresponds with the saturn return, an astrological pattern in which saturn returns to the same position it was when you were born. this happens around age 27-30 (and again 57-60). astrologically speaking, it's when we truly enter adulthood.

(interestingly, gwen stefani was about 30 when no doubt released their album "return of saturn".)

anyway, i didn't know about this saturn return until i was in the midst of it. i told a friend in so many words how it felt like my world was changing and i was becoming a new person and she said nonchalantly, "oh, it's your saturn return." my what?

the saturn return is a time of great reflection, transition and emotional upheaval. many will start to question the path they are on and seek answers to other deep questions. some will reprioritize and make drastic changes. it's an exciting time, but anyone who's asked themselves the big questions and made big changes knows it can also be quite scary.

Saturn often asks us “Whose movie am I in?” and then challenges us to be the director and author. Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we could just read our lines in the screenplay and have the ghost of “Christmas Future” come to us to show us the way? Instead, we are called to become our own “author-ity”---to truly become the author of our life. - saturn return

i wish i would have journaled more during those years, but i think i was so fearful of my thoughts i didn't want to write them down. thank goodness john was sort of going through the same thing (he's less than two months older than me) because i had someone to talk to. it was hard to talk to others at the time without coming off as a little whacky. if you notice, most people want to keep the convo light, talk about facebook and tv shows, not who we are and why we are here. *snort*

it's hard to put into words how i changed and what changed really. others with similar experiences call it becoming conscious or waking up, though those terms are used loosely now and i'm not sure if we even have words to describe it. i can say my perception of life changed - i felt more, questioned more, let go more, loved more, struggled more, lived more, and learned to fear less.

outwardly, i chopped off my hair. i took my life back and retired from the rat race at the age of 28 (and now spend my days doing what i consider to be fulfulling). i started caring more about what i put in and on my body and less about what other people thought of me. i began on the journey to self-sufficiency, learning to grow and store my own food, insuring my own health and wellness. ultimately, i became more responsible for my self. i guess that's what becoming an adult is.

i'll be 31 on saturday. 'til next time, saturn.=)

photo sources one // two

feeling gratitude for...

connections with family, friends, bloggers and complete strangers

kindness from complete strangers

kisses and love from our furry friends

the calm place inside that knows no matter what, we are always ok

the light that seems to shine brightest after our darkest moments

sunny days, chirping birds, brilliant sunsets, and garden flowers still thriving

 marigolds and pea blossom

 white allysum and petunia

"Today will be joyous, for the beauty slamming against my face is unwilling to be ignored."
Susan Mrosek

things i'm looking forward to

a day in the garden, harvesting and cleaning up
a cross stitch project (it should be cute!)
the super annoying zit on my face healing
sharing my squash and escarole soup recipe
a homemade pumpkin muffin for dessert
and a trip to the library (the good earth, i'm coming for you!)

what i'm enjoying now - a full belly from a quick and healthy meal, a clean sink, and sharing my thoughts with you lovely people.=)

a funny story for the mature readers:

i texted my mom today to ask her how to dry up a zit. but i described the zit as being full of puss. puss-y. so she read the text and saw how do i dry out a p*ssy zit! aghhh! no, mom, it's on my face! yikes!=)

so seriously, how do you? in the past, i've always just squeezed the bejeezus out of my pimples. john says to leave it alone. i'm wondering if i should treat it with a hot compress and tea tree oil. thoughts?

this week i...

enjoyed cooler days with the trio in the "treehouse"...

the cat goes down the slide!

...took lots of wagon walks...

 

my childhood friend's chickies, bubby and evolet

and their gymnast cat, oscar

...finally let the munchkins explore my "white car"...

 oscar included

...ate lots of tasty salads with raw eggplant bacon...

 green leaf lettuce, tomato, cucumber, green onion and eggplant bacon with leftover nacho cheeze made with white bell pepper and cashews

 

 green leaf lettuce, heirloom cherry tomatoes, cooked quinoa, and raw eggplant bacon with extra-virgin olive oil, himalayan salt and pepper

...was rustled out of dreamworld each morning by this lil' piggy...

new nickname, claws

...started the last book of the lovable anne of green gables series...

  my mom gifted me with the collection=)

...henna'd my gray hairs

and received my new specs in the mail.

plastic aunt jemima head-wrap

...made rawlmond joys and peanut butter cups

yummy

and took photos only with my cell, just because. 

complete the sentence, if you'd like...

this week i __________.

this is where i blog

in case you were wondering...=)

random reflections

happy friday! i had to ask three times what day it was. when you don't have a set work schedule, the days blend together. no more longing for the weekend. it's grand.

miss madj woke me up with a claw up my nose. a very sharp one. john woke up with two scratches on his nose. she literally demanded four breakfasts. piggy.=)

our meals have been pretty simple lately. much of my energy has gone to gardening and preserving. i'm slowly learning the ways of  preserving and what works for our small family of two. after years of consideration, i finally purchased a mini food saver. (well, my mom bought it for me as a bday gift.) before, i had the silly notion that preserving was only for an abundance of produce. now i've been blanching and freezing anything i think we won't eat soon. here's what's in the freezer so far:

 3 bags of diced zucchini for making pizza crusts, 3 bags of grated zucchini for zucchini bread and 2 bags for zucchini brownies, 5 bags of sliced zucchini for stir-fries, veggie tacos or side dishes, 3 bags green beans, veggie burgers and zucchini crab cakes.

through craigslist i purchased 120 used canning jars for 65 bucks. she asked for 80, i said 50, and we met in the middle. it was a big chunk of change but now i won't have to buy jars for a really long time. but i didn't consider that i'd need to buy lids. preserving aint always cheap, but it's worth it.

 one of the pretty lids

the jars were filthy (so much for "excellent condition") so i scrubbed them out on our deck. three hours, two pruny hands, two blisters and one sunburn later, they were good as new.

while scrubbing, i noticed that brillo pads have the pleasant scent of an older gentleman's cologne. speaking of older *ahem* gentlemen, i was thankful my nosy (but sweet) neighbor wasn't home. he looks at me like i have 8 heads whenever i'm working outside. everyday he asks, "you working?" meaning do you have a "real job" yet? i want to say of course i'm working - i'm growing my own food here! but i just smile and say, "not yet, jimmy." he seems to think gardening is crazy and when i told him i don't eat much meat i thought he was going to throw a shoe at me! he likes that i listen to his fishing adventures which i guess is why he hangs around me. one day i caught the snoop in my compost bin! "looking for something, jimmy?"=)

we are having perfect summer weather - hot but a little breezy with low humidity. we've turned our air conditioner off and the house hasn't gotten warmer than a comfortable 78°. i just love sleeping with the windows open.

fall planting has gotten underway and we have some cabbage, collard and broccoli sprouts. yesterday i planted kale and escarole, and today i'm sowing carrots in the garden (if i'm not too sore).

 source

last night i took a yoga class for the first time in a year. i really enjoy yoga but can't afford the membership fees, so i was very excited when i found a studio that offers discounted drop-in classes. at first i started yoga to gain more flexibility. i'll never forget my high school gym teacher saying to me, "if you're this unflexible now, imagine what you'll feel like as an old lady!" that was a huge wake-up call and ever since i've had the intention of taking good care of this vehicle into old age.

what i wasn't expecting from yoga was the philosophy/spirituality - guidance on being present, shedding fear, expanding into the moment, accepting everything as it is. last night i was pleasantly surprised when the instructor read part of the preamble to the declaration of independence: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

she went on to say true freedom is the state of being ok with what is. in that aspect, no one can take our freedom away. many of you are probably like, "what? you live in america, land of the free, who'd take your freedom away?" well, when you live in a country where you could go to jail for growing food on your own front lawn or for having unlicensed pets, you begin to see you're not as free as you think.

now, i understand people are seriously oppressed in other parts of the world, and i don't take my liberties for granted. yoga and meditation are helping me see everything for what it is and i'm so very thankful for the peace of mind i find in remembering that this is just an experience, fear is merely an illusion, and infinite love/oneness is the only truth. 

did you really make it through this post?!=) thank you for reading. hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

sunday in photos

prom pictures

'tis the season for proms, so i thought i'd scan and share some photos. did you attend your school proms? did you also find them to be silly and overrated?

 junior prom 1998

 senior prom 1999

nothing magical happened at my proms. as i recall, the date above spent most of the time at the buffet instead of dancing with me. we also got lost on the way home. 

however, i did love my dresses, though i stressed for months finding them. perhaps this is the root of my aversion to weddings. too much work for one night, imo.

funny fact: we double-dated with john and his girlfriend at the time, so i did kind of go to my senior prom with johnny boy.=)

my blog's two today=)

last year i completely overlooked my blog's first birthday, the neglectful blog-mommy i was. this year i thought i'd celebrate and talk a little on how this blog came to be.

weeks prior to my blog's inception, i hardly knew what blogging was. my friend missy had a blog for her family, and when i became passionate about animal-friendly eating, she encouraged me to start one to share my recipes. so i did. here was my original header:

i have to laugh at how impersonal my first post was - i just slapped up a recipe for vegan pizza and that was that. but when i started following other food bloggers, i found myself inspired by those who shared more of their personal lives, and this space evolved into a place for me to share and connect.

though i no longer label myself vegan or vegetarian, i still prefer to prepare and eat animal-friendly meals, so the title will stay - for now.=)

my sincerest thanks to everyone who supports and encourages this blog. i'm grateful for every thought you contribute, and as a small token of my appreciation, i'm hosting a fun little giveaway - details to come later in the week!

a delightful discovery...

anne of green gables is just the beginning of an eight-book series! EIGHT! life is good.=)

the second book i'm reading now depicts anne's first year as a teacher! and look how lovely the copies are at the local library. i couldn't imagine prettier covers. i'm inspired to paint our bedroom a light turquoise...

though anne was a schoolma'am over one hundred years ago, i find myself relating, especially with this reply when marilla asks how her first day was: "My thoughts feel as if they had been all stirred up until they were thick and muddy."

some of my other favorite quotes thus far:

"After all," Anne had said to Marilla once, "I believe the nicest and sweetest days are not those on which anything very splendid or wonderful or exciting happens but just those that bring simple little pleasures, following one another softly, like pearls slipping off a string." 

"Anne smothered a little sigh. She loved Diana dearly and they had always been good comrades. But she had long ago learned that when she wandered into the realm of fancy she must go alone. The way to it was by an enchanted path where not even her dearest might follow her." 

"I'd like to add some beauty to life," said Anne dreamily. "I don't exactly want to make people know more... though I know that is the noblest ambition... but I'd love to make them have a pleasanter time because of me... to have some little joy or happy thought that would never have existed if I hadn't been born." 

(Anne of Avonlea) 

"Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive - it's such an interesting world. It wouldn't be half so interesting if we know all about everything, would it? There'd be no scope for imagination then, would there?"

"There's such a lot of different Annes in me. I sometimes think that is why I'm such a troublesome person. If I was just the one Anne it would be ever so much more comfortable, but then it wouldn't be half so interesting."

"It was November - the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines. Anne roamed through the pineland alleys in the park and, as she said, let that great sweeping wind blow the fogs out of her soul."

(Anne of Green Gables)

last two photo's source