Sunday, December 26, 2010

thankful it's over...

though i enjoyed being crafty this christmas, i'm so glad it's december 26th. next year i may opt out of the madness altogether. if i hear one more parent tell their child to "be good because santa is watching", i may scream. i know parents mean well, but come on. lying to your children to get them to behave in a way you'd like them to is pretty sneaky. and is that what we really want to instill in our children... "be good" because someone may be watching? sounds big-brotherish to me. the analytic in me finds the whole tradition to be rather disturbing.

to teach our children to embrace truth, there will be no santa lies in our house. our children will not worship a character who guzzles bottles of coke on billboards and gorges on cookies and dairy milk. to teach them to find happiness in things other than plastic toys made with slave labor in china, we will celebrate the season in a very different way, if we celebrate at all. for me, the spirit of peace, love, joy, family, and goodwill is worth honoring every day, and should not be saved for a holiday based on buying happiness and selling lies.

and that's how i feel about that!=)


  1. Hear hear, I second everything you said!And I 'd add that telling them about Santa watching is making them do what they are told because they 'll gain something in return. These are they values we teach our children??

  2. I'm glad you think so! Something I've wanted to say. I remember myself being angry when I realised there was no Santa. My first thought was: Why did they lie to me?! I think parents shouldn't lie to their children. And not to give them so many present that they don't know how to be grateful anymore.

  3. Ditto the Hear, Hear! We all know that should be "be good because Granny is watching".


  4. Ha. I agree with you---mostly. I know there is a Santa; He's just not the one portrayed in ads and by some other folks. We try very hard to celebrate Christmas as we read the bible and think about Christ. Our gift-giving is of almost no consequence. We have God and each other and anything more than that is gravy. And we realize we really don't deserve any of it as it is all a gift from Him.

    And if I hear one more idiot say "I bought Christmas for the kids", I'm gonna scream.

    Thanks for a great post, Kelli---but tell us how you REALLY feel about it! :) Blessings.

  5. That's always been my problem with Christmas is the whole; If your good for the weeks coming up until christas (and actually even if your not) You will get lots of toys!

    So what is the message: Only give to recieve... or only be Good when theres something in it for you.
    ...Its one of them.

  6. Growing up my family never pretended that santa was real. Instead I was told he (St. Nicholas) was a very generous man who lived a long time ago and always shared gifts with people he cared for. For Christmas we all acted in his spirit and gave gifts to the special people in our lives. My brother has passed on the same tradition to his four kids. None of them believe in Santa Claus but they all love participating in the spirit of the season - creating gifts for their parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles. No lies - lots of fun.

  7. ha ha! You crack me up with your frankness and I LOVE IT! I'm not sure if I grew up ever believing in Santa (I had older siblings to help with the truth *wink*) but we had fun with the concept of santa. he brought us a gift but we didn't believe in him except similar to what veganlisa wrote, we believed he was a real man (saint) who was generous in giving to others (I believe there are many 'santas' in the world - past and present). the commercial santa wasn't what we were brought up to "worship" or told was real. with our baby he's not going to be raised in believing that the santa we see today is real but is just for fun. we hope to instill in him values and know the real meaning of Christmas and also to be kind and charitable all days of the year.

  8. roselie - thanks for adding... extrinsic motivation was something that bothered me about the "behavior management plans" of schools i worked in.

    lela - i didn't like that i was lied to either, but i know they did it with good intentions, and it was a fun tradition to believe with my siblings.

    ha, granny!=)

    hehe, thanks clint. it was something i really needed to get out of my system.=)

    mel - yeah, even when we were brats we still got gifts! santa was very forgiving in my house!=)

    lisa - thanks for sharing your lovely tradition. the spirit of the season is what keeps me participating each year.

    heidi - hehe, was i too blunt?

    thanks for sharing your thoughts! xoxo

  9. being good for a bribe really doesn't work for the long term. although i have to admit at times i was guilty of it as a teacher, but i tried to use self-reflection and goal setting to off-set it. i could write a novel on it! I think it can be very maddening and it's probably not wise to feed kids too much sugar and rush them around so much which would put anyone in a bad mood.

    I hadn't really thought of whether i'd do santa or not if i had kids. I like the idea of a little magic but not something so commercialized as santa. perhaps the solstice fairy will visit instead.

  10. bitt - my old principal constantly did bribes and even santa threats and it drove me nuts. especially since we were in a very low income area. it saddened me that they may think they didn't get much bc they didn't deserve it.

    in my classroom we learned to "do the right thing" out of respect for each other, our earth, ourselves and our learning. we also learned to be examples for how we'd like each other to be. i miss that aspect of teaching first grade science - nurturing their nature, so to speak.

  11. This is so true!! Over the holidays someone told me this story of this little girl who said that she was naughty all year and Santa still brought her everything she wanted. Now what does that teach kids?

  12. melissa- it's crazy! so many mixed messages...

  13. AMEN I say to that. We have 5 children and we don't lie, period! on any occasion. So I never told them anything about the secular world's "santa", except to explain the history of how it came about and that it is not what we believe or acknowledge. We celebrate the feast days of great saints and one of them happens to be St. Nicholas but it has nothing to do with Christmas. We celebrate Christ's birth and all the other wordly and commercial things that happen in December are just things on the side that we don't allow to taint how we truly celebrate. We just ignore all of the garbage out there and are happy inside our comfortable bubble!! Keep any sharp objects away please! :)
    Peace and Raw Health,

  14. thanks for sharing, elizabeth. i respect the christian celebration, though it doesn't resonate with me. biblical evidence points that jesus was born in the fall or spring.

    "keep sharp objects away"... hehe=)

  15. Oh my gosh, I had no idea people were doing that to Santa, nowadays (guzzling coke? gah!). I love to say I believe in the spirit of Santa (nobody needs to know that spirit channels through me) while celebrating the spirit of that presence (when a jolly Santa walks by). At the same time, I love showing how to give words/love instead of material items. It's a win/win, but takes a couple years to get used to...then can't believe there was ever any other way. Mostly, I'm shocked that people still gift exchange, unless it's to little ones (few, meaningful, educational, warm clothing, etc., yay) or those in need of things (food, clothing, etc.). Of course, this is what no TV does to the mind...we no longer know what's happening out there, anymore...and it's so nice to live this way. :o)

  16. hey ms. a!=) thanks for commenting. i believe in the spirit of giving but for me it has little to do with santa and christmas and everything to do with being human. it's in our nature to give and receive freely, more than just gifts of objects but of time, love, good thoughts, energy...

    i'm transitioning into a new way of being with family and friends around the holidays and staying true to myself, and the rant came out of frustration. i don't own a tv and still know what's "happening out there", so maybe i'll go into seclusion next year, or just shut up about it!=)


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